January 23, 2023

 It is really frustrating and deeply annoying, not to mention slightly unsettling psychologically. I have soreness returned to my throat again. I met Atul for lunch at Zuma and not he long drive back to work, I felt it coming on. And it got more prominent, as it usually does, in the next 24 hours. No one, least of all me, wants to read about my cold and soreness. I still have to write about it because it seems to be always on my mind .Because it is always in my body. 2 rounds of antibiotics and I thought I had finally wiped off the bastard clean. But it only lasted a few days and now back. What is it going to take to get rid of it and how I do I maintain equanimity. Do I just get used to this as the new normal. A normal which always has physical discomfort which waxes and wanes but always lingers. And so all the activities that I have take myself to accomplish keep getting derailed. I didn't feel like a swim today so I didn't go. I wasn't feeling like writing my entry either but I ended up doing it- and it will be an easy one as I am in the mood for an epic rant. I don't know whom to direct my anger to. I read somewhere- and nowadays whenever I say this, what Ir really mean is that I didn't read it anywhere- more like I watched it while dumb scrolling on some social media platform- that the road to happiness was not thinking about things over which we have no control. Like that is an insight? What is with these motivational speakers- who makes them so famous for pouring forth such drivel? Another speaker that came up in smy feed asked us to "Act as if nothing bothers you". Or make sure you become the person who does things  and does thing "fast". Whatever it is you do, the sense of urgency is what all high-performing people have. I have one- if you want to be happy, stay healthy, make a routine of things to do- consisting of relatively simple tasks and do them come hell or high water. That will make you feel like you are killing it- even if you actually aren't making damned bit of dent to the universe. But I hear through the grapevine that the universe actually has an arcane mechanism to reward such micro-discipline. And again, I never believed this myself were it not for my guitar playing experience. I don't talk that much about it, but it has really changed me. Not musically, although that too. It just has given me the confidence that if I keep at something, iny authett can be overcome - whatever it is. I didn't really believe this, although I knew this as a general dictum, I never felt it inside my belly with any authenticity. Not any more.

As I reflect on today, I realize that I have spent some time thinking about the plight of muslims in India at the moment. Now this is not a topic I would discuss openly, but ling dsecretly I  feel a bit bothered by it. I am right of center all right- I see no reason as a Hindu to be somehow ashamed or apologetic about my faith. But I still think it is largely a private matter and does not need to be brandished with such obstreperousness that hindu brethren in India seem to doing. It is simply ugly and unsophisticated.  And the only one to blame for this is the ruling dispensation in India. This has been their recipe to stay in power. It has worked, they have been in power and dare I say, overall have done some really good things for the country so far. But the side-effect of adopting this strategy is creating a safe haven for a form of viciousness that pours forth from religiosity. The religion, if were must call it that, is not inherently exclusivist, let alone violent. We have a long history to prove these credentials. Equally, we have been taken advantage of because we had such admirable traits. It has all come to a head- now we are openly in "riot" mode- trampling over minorities with disdain. Even if we are not doing this literally, we are doing it in spirit. And no amount of my hindu friends denying it is going to change my mind. It is a bloody shame- it can be controlled with a bit of will. But it is all being tolerated, even promoted. We really need not avenge the past. We just need to set things right today for us. We can and should do what we rightfully want when it comes to matters of our faith. But why do we have be an asshole about it all the time?

The other thought I had when contemplating this religious polarization in India is the following. We know that Muslims feel relatively safe in at least 5 states- Kerala, Tamil Nadu, Telengana, West Bengal and Orissa. What will surely happen, especially after another successful impending BJP victory at the center, is that Muslims in other states will start migrating to these states seeking a safer and higher quality life. Within India, there are no borders so it is not like anyone can prevent this. These 5 states are likely to see an influx of close to 200 million people over the next few years. That will make them Muslim ghettos. Imagine life then for the hindus in these states? They will not wield political power anymore, and will probably realize that being secular in their ideology was a mistake. While the thought is admirable for its altruism, it is a bit late to harbor it. The rest of India is surging with saffron- the Nash equilibrium would thus dictate that the optimal action in these 5 states should be for every hindu voter to vote BJP. It may seem counter-intuitive to the liberal, left-wing, secular or otherwise charitably titled voter- but we can see why this is  still the optimal decision. I have no idea how things will unfold for the muslims in particular. They are 200M strong, and in the best of times not known to take insult or ignominy lying down. The psychology of the human condition is extremely volatile and fragile- and when they also feel hemmed in like the way they do, it is not entirely predictable how events will unfold. All I can hope for is that the members of the BJP who have an above average IQ would be thinking these matters through. If they only took it slightly easier on where muslims were concerned, we'd have a government in India that would have  as clean a scorecard as ever happened for as long as I can remember.